Dear Dr. House

Dear Dr. House,

I'm offering you a case you won't be able to resist. It's the differential you've been waiting for. It's the one patient Cuddy, 13 and even Taub will beg you to save. It's your opportunity to laugh at a federal agent who carries a manpurse. It's Jack Bauer.

In order to be helpful, here are some of Mr. Bauer's symptoms:

-Been exposed to a bio weapon

-Never goes to the bathroom (bladder infection?)

-Neverending feeling of urgency and doom (schizophrenia? depression?)

-Whispers and constantly out of breath (asthma?)

-Been exposed to and possibly bitten by a rodent otherwise known as Audrey Raines (rabies?)

Thank you and please save him before next Monday night.

P.S. Keep him away from Kutner. Unless you get bored and want to learn about his past life as Ahmed the terrorist...